Why Forgiveness Is Difficult

Reflection Date: September 13 2026 | Twenty-fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time
Daily Readings: Sirach 27:30—28:7; Romans 14:7-9; Matthew 18:21-35

Children of God:
In biblical times, lending money, food, or other necessities was a common part of community life, especially when people faced poverty, famine, or unexpected hardship. 

The Law recognized lending as something that could help a person survive, but it also placed strong limits on how creditors treated those who were struggling. 

Israelites were warned not to exploit the poor through excessive interest, and loans to fellow Israelites were treated differently from ordinary commercial transactions. 

A person could also offer something as security for a loan, but the law placed restrictions on what a lender could take or keep, especially when the pledge was essential for a poor person's daily life. 

Debt could become serious enough that a person might lose property, freedom, or even become a servant because of what was owed. 

At the same time, the biblical tradition included the idea of releasing debts and restoring people to economic freedom, particularly through the practice associated with the Jubilee. 

Lending, therefore, was not simply a business arrangement but something connected with justice, compassion, and the responsibility of one person toward another. 

In modern times, lending has become much more formal, involving banks, contracts, interest rates, credit scores, collateral, collection agencies, and legal agreements. 

The difference is striking because modern lending often operates through institutions and financial systems, while biblical lending was much more deeply tied to relationships within a community. 

Yet the basic human problem remains the same: someone owes something, someone expects to be repaid, and sooner or later we must decide what we will do when the person cannot or will not pay.

The gospel story of the unforgiving servant gives us a powerful lesson about what happens when we become very good at remembering what others owe us but very poor at remembering what we ourselves have received.

So, what are our inspirations for today? 

First, forgiveness is difficult when we keep a better record of other people's debts than of God's mercy.

The servant in the gospel story owed his master an enormous amount, a debt so great that repayment was practically impossible. 

He pleaded for patience, and the master responded with something far greater than patience: he cancelled the entire debt. 

Jesus presented this moment as an extraordinary act of mercy because the servant received something he could never have earned by himself.

But the story took an unexpected turn when that same servant met another servant who owed him a much smaller amount. 

Instead of remembering the mercy he had just received, he demanded payment and refused to show compassion. 

The problem was not simply that he wanted his money back; the deeper problem was that he measured his relationship with another person only by what that person owed him.

This can happen in our own lives. 

We sometimes remember the insult but forget the times someone helped us, remember the mistake but forget the many times we ourselves were forgiven, and remember what another person failed to give us while forgetting what others patiently gave us. 

Jesus was inviting us to look at our own lives honestly and ask whether we are keeping a mental account book where every offense is carefully recorded. 

Forgiveness is difficult when we keep a better record of other people's debts than of God's mercy.

Second, forgiveness does not mean erasing the past. It means refusing the past control the future.

The second servant in the gospel story owed a much smaller amount, yet the forgiven servant treated him harshly and had him put into prison. 

When the master learned what happened, he became angry because the servant received mercy but refused to extend that same mercy to another person. 

Jesus used this dramatic contrast to show that forgiveness was never meant to be something we receive only for ourselves.

It means refusing to allow the injury to become the permanent ruler of our hearts.

There are people who continue to live years after an offense while still allowing the person who hurt them to occupy space in their minds every day. 

Sometimes the person who caused the wound has already moved on, while the wounded person continues carrying the weight. 

Jesus invites us to consider whether holding on to the debt is actually costing us more than the debt itself. 

Forgiveness does not mean erasing the past. It means refusing the past control the future.

As we reflect, we ask ourselves: 

What debts or offenses am I still keeping in my heart even though I myself have received forgiveness many times? 

Who is the person I need to forgive so that the past no longer controls the way I live in the present? What practical step can I take today to become more merciful without denying the reality of the hurt I have experienced?

Children of God:
The gospel story reminds us that mercy is not merely something we ask for when we are in trouble. 

Mercy is also something we are called to practice when someone else is in trouble. 

We all carry debts that other people have forgiven, forgotten, or patiently endured. 

Jesus challenges us to examine which debts we are still collecting in our hearts. 

We cannot change what happened in the past, but we can decide how much power it will have over our future.